Yes, now I didn’t lose a child nor would I ever compare my situation to that, ever. But I understand how grief fucks you up so well. I may not have lost a child but I had one with complex special needs as well. I hoped with all of the therapy he has had he would have been a lot more independent, but he’ll never be. The best we can hope for is that he’ll be semi independent which is attainable. But he’s 17 and boys that age are learning to drive, dating, hanging out with friends, and looking into college. Not my son. In fact it’s a celebration that his vocabulary is increasing and yeah it’s great and all but that all goes to hell when I see other boys his age doing age-appropriate things. So what’s the best can I hope for his future? He’ll get picked up from his group home and work at some menial job and get driven back. I know this doesn’t compare to losing a child and I hope you know I’m not doing that. I’m just telling you I get grief and I get how it fucks you up. I have always been fucked up from so much bullying I endured in my youth but this fucked me up more. I will never soften up either like so many expect me to do.